07. rest well ☁️
i can’t believe it’s only been a week since i rocked out at Rockaraoke (and ticked “performing on stage with a live rock band” off my bucket list). 🥵
Life these days feels like someone accidentally pressed the fast-forward button and kept their finger on it — days and weeks are blending together, losing all shape and form aside from a few salient moments. these moments are precious: memorable in their simplicity, their innocence. pockets of time stolen from the everyday rush; where i get to take a breath, connect with myself, and just breeeeeathe.
lately, i’ve been thinking a lot about rest — specifically, what makes me feel rested. in a world of go go go go, it’s easy to get swept up in the current; to place the blame — and burden — of your wellbeing on extenuating circumstances: “work was too busy.” “this took up too much of my time.” “i have no idea where to start.”
the latter was me. i started on the career hamster wheel at an early age. by the age of 20, i was burning the candle on both ends; working two jobs, attending networking events every night, and hustling for opportunities. it felt like an achievement to be “ahead of the curve”, to be “so far ahead for my age”, so i never thought to slow down. to explore new hobbies. to figure out what i liked to do for fun.
fast forward to the pandemic, and whew, that hit me like a ton of bricks. suddenly, all my usual cop-outs — traveling for work, meeting new people, speaking at events — were off the table. i had no way to access fun and sociability anymore. i was left with the same four walls of my apartment. what was a girl to do?
it took a lot of trial and error, but i think i finally figured out the basics:
think of rest as two categories — passive rest and active rest. passive rest are the conventional tropes that come to mind when you think about “rest”: taking a nap, scrolling through social media, binge watching Netflix. there’s absolutely a time & place for passive rest — for me, i’m superglued to my Instagram ‘Explore’ page at the end of a looooong work day — but the thing is, it’s not that great for rejuvenation and revitalization: the things we ACTUALLY hope to get from rest.
active rest, on the other hand, is exactly as its name says: it’s ACTIVE. intentional. you make a conscious decision to do something that uplifts, inspires, and energizes you. “but Gwen,” you might ask at this point. “what if i have no idea what that is?”
great question, random citizen. this brings me to my next point:
active rest is about CREATION. 🌈🌱☀️🌸
i have no idea why it took me THIS LONG (read: 27 years of life) to figure out, but it makes SO MUCH SENSE. to generate MORE energy, we need to EXPEND energy. we need to do things that are generative, productive, creative. these words have been bastardized by the business world, but i mean them in their purest sense. that’s how the cycle of abundance flows … and how Life, in essence, works.
here are some of my favorite ‘solo’ ways to GENERATE energy:
🌱 going for walks in nature,
📸 taking beautiful photographs,
🤪 trying something new for the first time,
🎨 painting with my watercolors (my current fave),
✍️ creative writing — stories, journaling, even this newsletter,
🎵 jamming out to music — singing along to old songs, or even karaoke!
💃 movement! dancing, yoga, running. moving my body just for fun :~)
bonus points if you get to combine them! on Friday, i had one of the most wonderful days in my memory. i’ve been feeling a bit “blah” and disconnected from myself, so i just listened to my body and went with the flow. after visiting my grandma on Friday, i stumbled upon the most beautiful forested area. we’d been in lockdown for so long that just being in the presence of so many trees… it felt like coming home. i spent fifteen minutes wandering around, just basking in the sounds, sights and smells of Nature, but it felt like an eternity. i was so fully, wholly present in the moment. 🌲
i enjoyed that experience so much that once i got home, i plugged in my earphones, grabbed an umbrella (it was drizzling! ☔️), and proceeded to have a 50-minute walk outdoors, snapping gratuitous selfies and singing along to the entire discography of Red – Taylor’s Version. i can hardly remember the last time i felt that happy.
i used to be obsessed with productivity. with having packed schedules and carefully planned itineraries. i’m slowly but surely learning that there is a flip side to the coin — of faith, and trust, and surrendering to the Flow of life. of listening to our body, instead of living in fear of it. of learning, growing, and flowing :~)
my face have been breaking out like crazy today. it could be one of three factors: [A] the new Vitamin D supplement i’m trying, [B] the pizza i had for dinner — my first in a month after cutting gluten out of my diet!, or [C] the apple cider vinegar i’ve been chugging to “moderate my glucose levels”.
living with PCOS is an endless game of inflammation roulette, and you never know what’s going to trigger it next. instead of freaking out or scrubbing my skin to death, however, i was surprised that i took it all in stride. (i’m pretty certain it’s [C], anyway.) this ain’t my first time at this rodeo, and i know it will heal in time. what’s important is that i continue to listen to my body, and honor what it needs.
Life might feel like a sprint right now… but in actual fact it is a marathon, and i will run it with grace. 💖
thank you so much for reading till the end! i can’t believe we’re almost two months into this experiment right now. honestly, it’s been hard AF to show up every Sunday, but we 👏 are 👏 pushing 👏 through!
did you resonate with my take on active rest and passive rest? is there anything you’d add to my ‘generative list’? if you try it out, i’d love to hear from you — write me anytime at me[at]gwenyi.com. see you next week! ☁️