10. the end, for now ☁️
we are in the double digits, people!!! and it is on this note that i will ceremoniously bring this secret Sunday newsletter to a halt… for now.
🤯
you might recall reading in previous editions that i’ve not felt excited about this creative endeavor for a while now. and while there are many compounding factors — the Sunday night time-crunch, the groggy starts to Monday morning, the competing private-journaling practice (and subsequent dilemma about which to prioritize, and more often than not, how much i should copy/paste here…) — the most salient reason is: i am at a point in my life where i need to clear out space for the fullest, most truest expressions of me. and i’ve found, to my chagrin, that this newsletter isn't it.
this Solar Eclipse and New Moon season has been rough. headaches, nausea, sleep loss, a constant unexplained pain in my neck… and the lessons. oh, the Universe has been completely unforgiving in its delivery, pulling no punches as it sends one after the other into my life. this has been a season about self love in the truest sense: i am learning to love me, ALL of me, even in my ugly, even in my pain. i am learning to take risks: in my fashion, in my communication, in the way i show up as and for myself. i am learning to see money as energy, and recognizing that it’s okay to use it to pamper and nourish myself, it’s okay to use it to make my own life better NOW (instead of channeling it back into the company, or saving it for a rainy day). ☔️
i feel raw, unhinged, vulnerable. but i’m also learning to ground myself in the everyday, to come back to the present and take note of the beauty unfolding around me. dew drops on flowers. grass beneath my feet. sun warming my face. birds singing in the trees. i had one such moment on Saturday, at the mini retreat GSKL hosted for us in the park. it was the longest amount of time i’d spent in Nature since the pandemic hit, doing all my favorite things: meditating, stretching, journaling, grounding. pure bliss ✨ i am committed to making time for more experiences like that in my life, where i get to just be in the Flow. that is where i am happiest, and the most “me”.
i am so grateful for this space. for 10 Sundays, i sat down in front of my computer and banged out a newsletter. that is no small feat — so i don’t want you to feel bad about “giving up halfway”, Gwen. you’ve accomplished your goal for this experiment: you’ve tried it out. and you found that, while it’s enjoyable, it’s currently doing you more harm than good. that’s not a failure. that’s brave.
it takes courage to let go of a good thing; to stop doing something BEFORE it’s too late. so i’m proud of you, Gwen. for making it happen, week after week, and then just deciding not to. for you. for you.
and to my dear reader — the person who is seeing this right now — thank YOU. i don’t know how you found your way to this space, but i am grateful for your presence, your attention (*wink*), your care. i hope we will get to journey together again someday.
but for now, i bid you adieu ☁️
and that’s a wrap for my secret Sunday newsletter! it’s been an incredible run, and i don’t regret it one bit ✨ as always, if any of this has resonated with you, please write me[at]gwenyi.com. i wish you everything you hope for, and more.
love & light,
Gwen 🤍